Party Launch · Volume 1, Edition 1 Filed under: General Disgruntlement Sponsored by no one. Funded by nothing. HQ: Wherever the wifi works Now accepting rants, retweets, and resentment Party Launch · Volume 1, Edition 1 Filed under: General Disgruntlement Sponsored by no one. Funded by nothing. HQ: Wherever the wifi works Now accepting rants, retweets, and resentment

Party Launch · Live since yesterday

Voice of the
Lazy &
Unemployed.

A political party for the people the system forgot to count. Five demands. Zero sponsors. One large, stubborn swarm.

Join the Party → Enter Rage Room 🎮 → Read the Manifesto

5Demands

0Corporate donors

∞Patience

1Founder, no PA

Official Poster · No. 001 ★ ★ ★

The Founder addresses the swarm at the inaugural rally

Together · Resilient · Unstoppable

"They tried to step on us.
We came back."

Approved

Chapter One

Our Movement's
Vision.

We are not here to set up another PM CARES, holiday in Davos on the taxpayer's salary slip, or rebrand corruption as "strategic spending." We are here to ask — loudly, repeatedly, in writing — where the money went.

Our Mission

Build a party for the young people who keep getting called lazy, chronically online, and — most recently — cockroaches. That's it. That's the mission. The rest is satire.

The Five Demands

The Manifesto.

Read it once. Read it twice. Then send it to someone who needs to read it.

01
If the CJP comes in power, no Chief Justice shall be granted a Rajya Sabha seat as a post-retirement reward.
02
If any legit vote is deleted, whether in a CJP or opposition-ruled state, the CEC shall be arrested under UAPA, as taking away voting rights of citizens is no less than terrorism.
03
Women shall receive 50% reservation, not 33%, without increasing the strength of Parliament. Additionally, 50% of all Cabinet positions shall be reserved for women.
04
All media houses owned by Ambani and Adani shall have their licences cancelled to make way for truly independent media. Bank accounts of Godi media anchors shall be investigated.
05
Any MLA or MP who defects from one party to another shall be barred from contesting elections — and from holding any public office — for a period of 20 years.

Membership

Are you eligible
to join?

We do not check religion, caste, or gender. We do, however, have four (4) standards.

REQ / 01 Unemployed By force, by choice, or by principle. We don't ask. ✓
REQ / 02 Lazy Physically only. The brain may continue to spiral. ✓
REQ / 03 Chronically online Minimum 11 hours a day, including bathroom breaks. ✓
REQ / 04 Can rant professionally As long as the content is sharp, honest, and points at something that actually matters. ✓

Join the Party →

Membership is free, lifelong, and revocable only by you.
No fees. No selfies with the leader. No "missed call to register."

Member Registration

Full Name

Official Party Role

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COCKROACH JANTA PARTY

Official Press & Membership Card

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Name COCKROACH SOLDIER

Designation National Spokesperson of Laziness

Member ID CJP-2026-8942

Abhijeet Dipke Party President

CJP Approved

Interactive cabinet reshuffle

CJP Lazy Cabinet Reshuffle Wheel

Are you tired of working? Appoint yourself as a mock minister in the Cockroach Janta Party cabinet! Spin the wheel, hear the retro ticks, and get your official high-fidelity vintage Appointment Certificate.

Spin to Reshuffle

Get in touch

Connect
with us.

Want to join, volunteer, complain, or send a meme? Use the form. We read everything. We reply to most things.

Email contact@cockroachjantaparty.org
Press contact@cockroachjantaparty.org
Headquarters Wherever the wifi works.
Founder Abhijeet DipkeFounder & Convenor

The Ultimate Slacker Test

CJP Lazy Meter Quiz

Think you have what it takes to be the supreme lazy citizen? Take our 5-question satirical Berozgaari Quiz, calculate your slacker rank, and download your CJP lazy certificate!

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Your Slacker Rank

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